Chasing the Unattainable: On Craft, Courage, and the Creative Life

By Jeff Cook

Interviewee: Brenda Malley

Introduction

Brenda mentioned multiple times during our interview that she took a “comfortable path” to artistry. My impression was different. Every story she told about her filmmaking career included bravery, resourcefulness, adaptability, perseverance and creativity. It was reassuring to see my philosophies reflected in hers. We’re both endlessly critical about our own output, constantly iterating toward some unattainable ideal. We both find as much or more meaning in the craft and journey as we do in the product.

Act 1

Brenda was ready for a new chapter as soon as her long career at the New Brunswick Department of Justice and Public Safety ended but wasn’t sure where that chapter would take her. In the first of what would be many serendipitous turns, a long-time friend and Vancouver Film School pupil began to regale Brenda with tales from the world of film.

This inspired Brenda to search for her new beginning by reaching out to Cat LeBlanc, the Member Services Director of the NB Film Co-op, who helped Brenda become a volunteer. Brenda says “everything that they had to offer, I took” as she began to get acquainted with filmmakers, technicians and affiliates in the NB filmmaking community. Meanwhile, Brenda had been writing. She said “I don’t want to finish writing [a script] and just leave it in the drawer. I wanted to see it on film.” Brenda recalls writing for the courts being a formative, transferable skill from her earlier career in this period: “I wrote thousands of reports for the courts. They are stories. You have to tell the entire narrative.”

During her early volunteer experiences at the Co-op Brenda was fortunate to have Brittany Sparrow as the Assistant Director on her first film “After the War.” She was shocked at the interest and turnout for auditions. “After the War” won four awards at the Silver Wave Film Festival in 2019. The awards themselves were flattering but Brenda was more motivated by the way they inspired others like her, in their fifties, to pursue their own creativity.

Act 2

Serendipity was a recurring theme in the development of Brenda’s current catalogue and her prolific output is exactly what enabled her to take full advantage of any exciting offers to collaborate. For example: she wrote The Town Clown in just three weeks during the unpredictable end of COVID-19 lockdowns and was able to secure a contractual arrangement with Bell TV. She says ”It’s networking. Always making sure that everything is a possibility or opportunity.”

Her film “Chuppah” is a great example of this. She submitted the script to the International Film Festival the Hague on a whim and received an award. To her surprise, the director of the festival reached out with an offer to collaborate. In the end, she decided to produce the script herself. She eventually submitted the produced version of Chuppah to the International Film Festival the Hague : “I won, and we [Brenda and Gary Weekes, her Director of Photography] had a ball. It was like a fantasy!” That festival connection also resulted in Brenda becoming an international juror for the past three years. She says the process is “informative, but can be overwhelming” as she’s watched over 200 films in a single year during the judging process. This festival is one of many ways she has built a network of academic and creative collaborators including a Professor from Sheffield, England, Dr. James Fitzmurice, who she is now working with on “The Cavendish Discovery of Witchcraft,” a short film currently in post production. It will be debuted at the International Cavendish Society that will be holding their biennial meeting scheduled for June 2026 at the University of New Brunswick in Fredericton.

Connections like these are only one type of serendipity that bring Brenda new creative threads to explore. Unlike the Hague’s festival director reaching out to her, Brenda met songwriter Robert Thomas by trying to obtain sync rights for a song for her recently completed, feature documentary film about the Escuminac Disaster. Brenda recalls Robert being inspired by Chuppah, that “a light went on” for him about stories “not having to be linear.” Brenda then went on to script and direct Robert’s most recent music video, “The Way We Roll” which has had a very favorable festival run to date.

Curtains

With collaborations appearing from both inbound and outbound requests, Brenda has plenty to work on but having a big workload isn’t her intention. In terms of her workload, she only wants to “always have one project that takes [her] to a film festival.” It’s her passion that drives this endeavor and not the potential monetary reward. She says “I’m sticking to what brings me joy. I don’t care if I ever make any money.” This allows her to fund, pursue and work on the projects as best serves her vision and the effort and investment of the cast and crew. She cites the NB Film Co-op as the critical glue and foundation that allows all of these goals to be achieved in tandem, while helping her continue to participate in a creative and welcoming community.

Brenda cites her age as the source of her urgency. She says “I’m 65 years old... I just plow through because I don’t know how long I have and I’m going to put out as many things as I can.” Brenda uses posters to materialize a script into a visual idea before putting the film into production. She has a room full of these posters that she calls her “Happy Room.” In here she can find motivation, imagining how the poster and script will blossom into a finished film.

Her advice to other creators reflects her own experience. She says about her life before getting involved in filmmaking “I had faith in myself to know that everything was going to be okay.” She says to recognize your agency over your career and life. When opportunities present themselves, our impression and interpretation of them is what controls their result. We write our own narrative and so, when wondrous opportunities present themselves, it’s right to pursue them to wondrous ends.